AWDTSG: What "Are We Dating The Same Guy?" Means

The acronym, how the groups work, whether you can check them, and what you can actually do if you have been posted in one.

Am I posted? Get a post removed Find your city FAQ

AWDTSG stands for "Are We Dating The Same Guy?" — a network of more than 200 private, women-only Facebook groups (and related Reddit communities) where members post photos, first names, and details of men they are dating, matched with, or suspicious of, and ask other members for "tea": red flags, shared history, or warnings.

What it stands for	Are We Dating The Same Guy?
What it is	Private, women-only Facebook groups — not an app or a website
Started	New York City, 2022
How many groups	200+ city groups across the US, Canada, the UK and Australia
Who can see it	Vetted women members only. Men cannot search it.
Can a post be removed	Yes — through group rules, Facebook policy, or escalation

Where AWDTSG came from

The first "Are We Dating The Same Guy?" group appeared in New York City in 2022 as a place for women to compare notes about men on dating apps. The format spread fast: today there are more than 200 city-specific groups across the US, Canada, the UK, and Australia with millions of combined members. Posts typically show a screenshot of a man's dating-app profile with a caption like "any tea on him?" — and other members reply with experiences, warnings, or accusations.

The same idea later moved to dedicated apps — most notably the Tea app, which turned the AWDTSG format into a nationwide, searchable platform. If you are researching AWDTSG because you were posted, the same dynamics (and the same removal principles) apply on Tea and its spin-offs. The differences are covered in AWDTSG vs. the Tea app.

Is there an AWDTSG app or website?

No. This is the single most common misunderstanding about AWDTSG, and it matters because it changes what you can do next. There is no official Are We Dating The Same Guy website, no login, and no app in either app store. The whole network lives inside private Facebook groups, which is exactly why nobody outside a group can search it. Sites advertising themselves as "the AWDTSG app" or an "AWDTSG checker" are unaffiliated third parties, and none of them has access to the inside of a private group either.

Why being posted matters

AWDTSG posts are anonymous for the poster but not for the subject: your face, first name, and city are right there. Groups are private, but screenshots leak to group chats, Reddit threads, and other platforms, and accusations made in one group get reposted in others. Members routinely screenshot posts before moderators can act. What starts as one post in one city group can follow your name for years.

Because the groups are invite-gated and women-only, most men never learn they were posted until a relationship suddenly ends, a date ghosts, or a friend passes along a screenshot.

How to find out if you're posted

You cannot search AWDTSG groups yourself, and neither can any automated tool — a private Facebook group is closed to everything outside it. Anyone selling an instant AWDTSG lookup is describing something Facebook does not permit. What actually works is narrower and slower:

Ask someone you trust who is already a member of your city's group to look.
Watch for the leaks. Screenshots routinely escape to Reddit, X, and group chats, and those are public.
Have a team that is inside the relevant groups check on your behalf — that is part of our free AWDTSG case review.
Check the Tea app separately. It is a different platform with a searchable database, and our free Tea App Checker searches it by photo.

The full version of this, including what each "AWDTSG checker" site really does, is in how to find out if you have been posted in AWDTSG.

How removal works

There are three removal paths, in escalating order:

Group rules. Every AWDTSG group has its own rules — many prohibit unverifiable accusations, full names, or workplace details. Posts that break them can be reported to group admins.
Facebook Community Standards. Harassment, bullying, and privacy violations break Facebook's own rules regardless of what group admins think. Reports filed under the right policy section are actioned by Facebook itself.
Escalation. Where a post makes false factual claims, formal defamation-based takedown requests are the next step — usually faster and quieter than a lawsuit.

Which path works depends on what the post says, which group it is in, and how its admins operate. That is the judgment call our team makes case by case — see the AWDTSG removal service, our comparison of AWDTSG removal options, and our guide to the Reddit side of Are We Dating The Same Guy. For posts in regular Facebook groups and pages, see Facebook defamation removal.

Every AWDTSG guide we have written

123 articles, grouped by what you are trying to do.

Am I posted? How to find out

The groups are private and women-only, so you cannot search them yourself. These explain what actually works, and what the "checker" sites do and do not do.

Getting a post removed

Every route to taking a post down, from the group’s own rules through Facebook policy reports to formal escalation.

Your legal rights

What is protected speech, what may be defamation, and what suing actually involves. General information, not legal advice.

Life after a post

What a post can do to your job, your relationships, and your head — and what helps.

AWDTSG by city and state

AWDTSG groups are organised by metro area, and which group a post is in changes who moderates it and which rules apply. Find yours below.

Cities (51)

States (50)

AWDTSG: Frequently Asked Questions

What does AWDTSG stand for?

AWDTSG stands for "Are We Dating The Same Guy?" — a network of private, women-only Facebook groups (and related Reddit communities) where members post photos and details of men they are dating or matched with, to ask whether other women have information about them.

What is the Are We Dating The Same Guy website or app?

There is no official Are We Dating The Same Guy website or app. AWDTSG runs entirely inside private Facebook groups, plus a handful of Reddit communities that discuss them. Sites that market themselves as the "AWDTSG app" or an "AWDTSG checker" are unaffiliated third parties. The closest thing to an app version of the same idea is the Tea app, which turned the AWDTSG format into a searchable platform.

How many AWDTSG groups are there?

There are more than 200 city-specific AWDTSG Facebook groups covering most major metro areas in the US, Canada, the UK, and Australia, with millions of combined members. Most large cities have at least one group; some have several splinter groups.

Can men see what is posted about them in AWDTSG groups?

Not directly. The groups are private, women-only, and vetted, and posting screenshots outside the group is against most groups’ rules — though screenshots leak constantly. Men usually find out they were posted through a friend, a partner, or a service that searches on their behalf.

Do AWDTSG checker sites actually work?

No tool can search inside a private Facebook group from the outside — not ours and not anyone else’s. Any site promising an instant automated AWDTSG search is describing something the platform does not allow. What genuinely works is a human who is a member of the relevant group looking, or a monitoring service that watches for leaked screenshots and reposts elsewhere on the internet. Our free Tea App Checker searches the Tea app, which is a different platform with a public-facing database.

Is AWDTSG legal? Can I sue if I was posted?

The groups themselves are legal, and true statements or pure opinions are generally protected speech. False factual claims about you may be defamation. Several men have filed lawsuits against groups, members, or Meta; most early cases were dismissed on procedural grounds, and litigation is slow and public. For most people, removal through platform channels is faster and quieter than a lawsuit — and does not create a public court record linking your name to the accusations.

How do I find out if I have been posted in an AWDTSG group?

You cannot search the groups yourself — they are private and women-only. Realistic options: ask someone you trust who is a member of your city’s group, or use a service whose team searches on your behalf. Our free Tea App Checker covers the Tea app, and our team searches AWDTSG Facebook groups as part of a free case review.

How do I get a post about me removed from AWDTSG?

There are three paths: reporting the post to the group’s admins under the group’s own rules, reporting it to Facebook under its Community Standards (harassment, bullying, or privacy violations), and escalation where the content is defamatory. The right path depends on what the post says and which group it is in. Our removal team handles all three.

Did Are We Dating The Same Guy shut down?

No. Individual groups are taken down, renamed, or split by Facebook or by their own admins fairly often, and each time one disappears the "AWDTSG is shut down" claim spreads again. The network as a whole is still active across more than 200 groups.

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