How to Remove Your Name From Are We Dating the Same Guy Groups

Marcus got the text from a coworker on a Tuesday afternoon. “Hey man, I don’t know how to tell you this, but there’s a post about you in this Facebook group my girlfriend is in.” Attached was a screenshot from the “Are We Dating the Same Guy - Chicago” group. His full name. His photo pulled from LinkedIn. A detailed story claiming he had manipulated multiple women, ghosted someone after three months of dating, and had “narcissistic tendencies.” The post had 247 comments and had been up for nine hours.

None of it was accurate. Marcus had ended a three-month relationship respectfully, in person, and the woman he’d dated had taken it badly. But by the time he saw the post, the damage had compounded. Screenshots had already been shared to two other Chicago-area AWDTSG groups. A woman he’d been talking to on Hinge stopped responding. His LinkedIn profile views had spiked, which meant people were connecting his professional identity to these accusations.

This is the nightmare scenario that plays out dozens of times every single day across hundreds of “Are We Dating the Same Guy” groups nationwide. And the worst part? Most men who find themselves in this situation make critical mistakes in the first 48 hours that make removal exponentially harder.

How Are We Dating the Same Guy Groups Actually Work

Understanding why removal is so difficult starts with understanding the group structure. AWDTSG groups operate in nearly every mid-sized to major city in the United States, Canada, the UK, and Australia. Major metro areas often have multiple groups. New York City alone has at least six active AWDTSG groups with memberships ranging from 30,000 to over 180,000 women.

The groups are private, meaning non-members cannot see posts. Membership is restricted to women, and most groups require answering screening questions to join. Admins verify that new members appear to be real women based on their Facebook profiles. Men are systematically excluded, which means you typically cannot see what’s been posted about you without someone sharing it with you.

Posting requires zero evidence. A member uploads your photo (usually pulled from a dating app profile, social media, or LinkedIn), writes whatever she wants, and hits post. There is no verification process. No fact-checking. No requirement to prove anything. The group culture operates on an implicit “believe women” ethos that, while well-intentioned for legitimate safety warnings, creates zero accountability for false or exaggerated claims.

Comments amplify the damage. Once a post goes up, other members chime in. Some share genuine experiences. Others pile on with speculation, assumptions, or unrelated gossip. A post that starts as one person’s complaint can snowball into dozens of women claiming to “know someone” who dated you, adding layers of accusation that never happened. Within hours, a single post creates a narrative that looks damning through sheer volume of engagement.

Why Self-Reporting to Facebook Doesn’t Work

If your first instinct is to report the post through Facebook’s standard reporting system, you’re going to be disappointed. Here’s what actually happens when you try the official channels.

You probably can’t even see the post. Since AWDTSG groups are private and women-only, you likely don’t have direct access. You might have a screenshot, but Facebook’s reporting system is designed for reporting content you can directly link to within the platform. Reporting a post you can’t access presents an immediate logistical problem.

Facebook’s automated review misses the point. Even if someone files the report on your behalf from inside the group, Facebook’s content moderation system evaluates policy violations: nudity, explicit violence, hate speech, spam. A post saying “this guy is a narcissistic cheater who manipulated me for six months” doesn’t trigger any of those filters. The AI categorizes it as a personal opinion or experience sharing and moves on.

Human review is a dead end too. The small percentage of reports that reach a human reviewer face a similar problem. Facebook’s community standards don’t prohibit someone from sharing their “experience” with another person. The reviewer sees a woman sharing a dating story in a group designed for that purpose and concludes it doesn’t violate guidelines. Case closed.

Group admins actively resist removal. Most AWDTSG group admins consider themselves advocates for women’s safety. When they receive requests to remove posts, whether from the subject of the post, their friends, or even their lawyers, admins typically refuse. Many groups have pinned posts explicitly stating they will not remove content based on requests from the men being discussed. Some admins go further, posting about the removal attempt itself, which generates a new wave of negative engagement.

We’ve tracked outcomes for hundreds of clients who attempted self-reporting before seeking professional help. The vast majority saw no results through Facebook’s standard reporting system. The rare exceptions involved photos that were clearly copyrighted professional headshots, not the defamatory text itself.

Every hour that post stays up, more people screenshot and share it. Our professional team removes AWDTSG and Facebook group posts every day. Get a free case review now.

Why Partial Solutions Don’t Work

Many people try to address individual elements of an AWDTSG post — the photo, the text, specific comments — hoping that removing one piece will solve the problem. In practice, partial solutions rarely produce meaningful reputation recovery. The poster or admin can simply repost, and the text of the accusations remains even if images are removed.

Effective AWDTSG removal requires a comprehensive approach that addresses all elements of the content simultaneously. Professional Facebook defamation removal services use proven methods that address the complete post, not just individual components, achieving results that piecemeal efforts cannot.

What Professional Removal Services Actually Do Differently

Professional removal works at a fundamentally different level than DIY attempts. The difference is not incremental — it’s the gap between the very low DIY success rate and a proven professional track record.

Specialized expertise. Professional services bring years of experience handling thousands of cases specifically involving AWDTSG groups and similar platforms. This expertise translates into proven methods that produce consistent results where individual efforts fail.

Comprehensive approach. A single Facebook report is easy to ignore. Professional services address the problem from every angle simultaneously, using professional methods that create conditions where removal becomes the most likely outcome. This comprehensive pressure produces results that piecemeal efforts cannot.

Multi-platform coverage. Professional services address not just the original post but content that has spread to other groups, other platforms, and search engines. Removing one post while leaving copies elsewhere accomplishes little.

Post-removal monitoring. Removing the original post doesn’t prevent reposting. Ongoing reputation monitoring catches reposts within hours, before they gain traction, and triggers immediate follow-up removal action.

The numbers bear this out. Professional removal services achieve a proven track record for AWDTSG group posts, and we work diligently to complete removals as quickly as possible. Compare that to the very low success rate of DIY reporting through Facebook’s standard channels.

You don’t have to wait for Facebook to act — they won’t. Professional removal works through legal compliance channels that get results. Talk to our team today — the consultation is free and confidential.

Case Study: Marcus’s Removal Timeline

Let’s go back to Marcus from the opening. After the initial shock wore off, here’s what actually happened.

Day 1: Marcus discovered the post. His instinct was to create a fake Facebook account to join the group and defend himself. Fortunately, a friend who works in PR talked him out of it. Instead, he documented everything: screenshots of the original post, all comments, any shares he could identify, and search engine results for his name.

Day 3: Marcus contacted our team. During the initial consultation, we identified the original post in the Chicago group plus cross-posts in two suburban groups, totaling approximately 400 comments across all three posts. We also found that Google had already indexed a cached version of the content through a third-party site that aggregates AWDTSG posts.

Day 5: We began executing our professional removal process, addressing all three posts simultaneously across multiple groups.

Day 9: Significant progress — photos removed from all posts, reducing engagement and visibility.

Day 14: All three posts removed in their entirety, including all comment threads. Complete removal confirmed.

Day 16: Search engine results cleared and we initiated reputation monitoring to watch for reposts.

Day 23: The aggregator site removed its cached content after receiving our legal notice.

Day 30 and ongoing: Monitoring confirmed no reposts. Marcus’s search results were clean. He reported that his dating life and professional interactions had returned to normal.

Total time from first contact to full resolution: approximately three weeks. Compare that to the months or years that unaddressed AWDTSG posts can continue causing damage.

The Cross-Platform Problem

AWDTSG groups don’t exist in a Facebook vacuum. Content posted in these groups routinely spreads to other platforms, and each one requires a different removal approach.

Tea App. Women who post in AWDTSG groups often post the same content on Tea App, the anonymous dating reputation platform. If you’re dealing with AWDTSG posts, there’s a meaningful chance similar content exists on Tea App too. Our Tea App defamation removal service handles both platforms in coordinated campaigns.

Instagram Stories and posts. Screenshots of AWDTSG posts get shared to Instagram, sometimes by the original poster, sometimes by other group members. Instagram’s content policies differ from Facebook’s, and removal requires platform-specific approaches.

Reddit and forums. Subreddits like r/dating and city-specific subreddits occasionally feature discussions referencing AWDTSG posts. Reddit’s anonymous structure adds another layer of complexity to removal efforts.

Google Search results. Even after content is removed from the source platform, Google’s cache and third-party scraper sites can keep the content visible in search results for weeks or months without targeted deindexing efforts.

Comprehensive removal means addressing every platform where content has appeared, not just the original Facebook group post. Leaving content on secondary platforms undermines the entire effort.

Ready to take action? Our team has helped hundreds of people remove defamatory Facebook group posts and take back their reputation. As seen on Mashable, 404 Media, and InsideHook. Submit your case for a free review.

What NOT to Do If You Find Yourself in AWDTSG

The mistakes people make in the first few days often determine how difficult removal becomes. Avoid these at all costs.

Do not create a fake account to join the group. Admins are skilled at identifying fake profiles. If you’re caught, you’ll be publicly outed in the group, which generates an entirely new wave of negative posts about you “trying to infiltrate” the group. This has happened to multiple clients before they reached us.

Do not confront the poster directly. Reaching out to the person who posted about you, whether to plead, threaten, or reason with them, almost always backfires. Screenshots of your messages will be shared in the group as evidence of “harassment” or “intimidation,” making you look worse and providing new content for engagement.

Do not have your current partner post a defense. Well-meaning girlfriends or wives sometimes post in the group defending you. This invariably triggers accusations that you “forced” her to post, that she’s been manipulated, or that she’ll “find out eventually.” It adds fuel without resolving anything.

Do not threaten legal action in the group. Vague legal threats posted in comments or conveyed through group members are viewed as intimidation tactics. They rally the group around the original poster and generate sympathy engagement. Actual legal action conducted through proper channels is effective. Bluster in Facebook comments is counterproductive.

Do document everything immediately. Screenshot the post, all comments, the poster’s profile (if visible), the group name and membership count, and any shares you can identify. This documentation is essential whether you pursue professional removal, legal action, or both.

When Professional Help Makes Sense

Not every AWDTSG mention requires professional intervention. If someone posted asking if anyone has dated you and the responses are neutral or positive, that’s the system working as intended. If a single comment mentions you briefly in a thread about someone else, the impact may be minimal.

Professional help becomes essential when:

• The post contains specific false claims (cheating, abuse, STDs, criminal behavior)
• The post has generated significant engagement (50+ comments, multiple shares)
• Content has spread to multiple groups or platforms
• The post is affecting your professional life (employer concerns, client loss)
• Your dating life has been measurably impacted (unmatching, cancellations)
• The original poster appears intent on continuing to post about you

If you’re dealing with a situation that meets any of these criteria, the window for effective action narrows with each passing day. Every day a post remains active means more comments, more screenshots, more cross-platform sharing, and more people who form permanent impressions based on false information.

Our team specializes in AWDTSG and Facebook dating group removal across hundreds of city-specific groups nationwide. We have the expertise and proven methods required for comprehensive removal of even the most challenging cases. If you need your name out of these groups, reach out for a free consultation and we’ll assess your specific situation within 24 hours.

The post about you didn’t happen with your consent. Getting it removed shouldn’t require you to navigate a broken system alone.